The Annual Fall Fecal Fest will be up and running September 1-19 at the Woodland Park Zoo. Apparently, this is the time of year when gardeners, farmers, and "Zoo Doo" loyalists scramble to get their hands on some prized, limited quantities of ... animal poo. more ›

No Zoo Doo this spring! Woodland Park Zoo just notified us that their highly popular Fecal Fest Zoo Doo lottery--which brings that "fresh Zoo smell" to your backyards and P-Patches--has been canceled for spring because of a shortage of safely Grade-A poop. Turns out there are "unacceptable levels of the herbicide clopyralid" in the Zoo's doo--the herbicide is used on hay and wheat fields, doesn't break down easily, and now that it's stored in the animal manure, would likely wreak havoc on gardeners' pea, sunflower and tomato crops. Is that all? "In laboratory tests, clopyralid caused what a U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) reviewer called 'substantial' reproductive problems," says Mindfully.org. Circle of goddamn life people! Used on wheat fields, eh? What's in your poop? (Strictly a rhetorical question.) more ›

Later this week, the Woodland Park Zoo kicks off their annual Fall Fecal Fest, during which you can procure (or enter to win) Zoo Doo, a delightful "blend of animal manures [elephants, hippos, zebras, giraffes, gazelles, oryx, ponies, and others] mixed with straw bedding, grass, leaves, and wood chips" from the zoo grounds. Apparently this shit's good for composting, fertilizing, and mulching. For more info on prices and pick up, call the (ugh) poop line at 206-625-POOP. more ›