Sigh. If you insist on talking like a pirate, at least do it correctly. more ›

Think back, won't you? Back to a time of innocence. A time before everyone and their mom went to Zombie Walks. A time when the most annoying group of people weren't covered in blood--they were covered in Seinfield-esque puffy shirts. Oh, the days when pirates re-roamed the Earth. Those were dark days, and for one day each year, they return, like non-undead douches from beyond the grave. Today is that day. more ›

Excited we be, as evidenced by the cannon's roar. Argh, matey it's Talk Like a Pirate Day. So batten down the hatches and raise yer pirate flag high. Just don' be rapin' and pillagin' nothin', cuz it's not be like a pirate day. Our friend Beka, who has pirate heritage, has a joke she made up, with which we'll leave you now. more ›