As the state gears up to vote on privatizing liquor sales, horror stories about the dangers of alcohol are the tactic of choice of the official No on I-1183 campaign, which is a little awkward given that the distilling industry is now joining them in criticizing the initiative. more ›

Pity the poor bastards at the Liquor Board, whose job is to contribute revenue to the state's general fund, which they do by selling us booze. Not too much, mind you, that would be Bad. (Which is why most stores still aren't open on Sundays or holidays.) But now, thanks to the budget deficit, they're supposed to raise more revenue, so they're going to be open on the Fourth. Trouble is, according to the Times, they can't even get the right bottles of liquor into the stores (no Campari yesterday at Lower Queen Anne, for example). We have a suggestion: form a SWAT Team (Jim, Jack, James) and send in the snowplows! more ›

The housing market might be crashing, the sky crumbling (oh...that's snow, you say?), and layoffs increasing, but don't worry: along with the booze biz, the tattoo industry here in Seattle is doing just fine. That doesn't really make sense to us except in conjunction with the liquor sales increase. People get laid off, get drunk, get a tattoo: it's a time-honored tradition. more ›

Starbucks may be having difficulties, but the liquor industry is doing just fine, thank you very much. Washington state liquor sales are up five percent this year, a statistic owed (we suspect) in large part to the contributions of all the laid-off Starbucks employees. After all, a latte may wake you up, but a whiskey-laced latte will wake you up to a world much softer than the world in which you fell asleep. Perhaps it's time to stimulate the economy by buying stock in Grey Goose. We would never suggest partaking in illegal activities, but we're certain now would be a lucrative time to get busy making moonshine. You could peddle it right outside Starbucks Corporate! (There are rumors of fast-approaching Microsoft lay-offs, too...supply and demand, people.) more ›