Showstopper of Seattle's long-running cabaret Angry Housewives was, you may recall, a number titled "Eat Your F***ing Cornflakes!" (What, you don't remember? Brain cells degraded by poor nutrition, no doubt.) Anyway, Starbucks is now seeking to recapture the breakfast market by offering freshly zapped oatmeal with a choice of fruit, brown sugar, or mixed nuts. All this turmoil in one store, all these decisions before 8 a.m.! Pike Place Roast not sexy enough for you?......

"Cheers! I'm gonna miss you!," by Seattlest Flickr contributor S x 2 Call us 'jaded', but Seattlest has come to expect corrupt politicians and scheming corporate shills to do their dirty work on Friday afternoons. It's just the way they work. Somewhere out there in public relations land, there must exist a playbook extolling the virtues of arson and manslaughter, as long as it's done on the last day of the week. So last night,......

The two clever guys living in Oklahoma City stumbled upon some pretty good evidence which appears to confirm that your Sonics will be known as the Oklahoma City Thunder next season. Seems the NBA is using that name on its website, too. (h/t Deadspin)......

Howard Schultz has done Wallace Stevens one better. The poet found 13 ways of looking at a blackbird, but since his return in January the CEO has tried 14 things to revitalize the brand—including such contradictions as offering both "better coffee" and "worse coffee," and getting rid of breakfast sandwiches and bringing back breakfast sandwiches. (Does he contradict himself? Very well then, he contradicts himself.) Diana Wolf has compiled the (still growing) list ... twice.......

It looks more and more like the Starbucks we grew up with has irretrievably lost its way. Every day brings news of layoffs and losses, maps of store closures, tanking stock price, deckchair shuffling in the executive suite, and the frantic introduction of new products (banana smoothies, indeed). digg_url = 'http://digg.com/food_drink/Is_Starbucks_In_Its_Death_Spiral'; In the beginning, down at Pike Place, a regular customer would know every company employee by name. Now there are over 150,000 people on......

All is not well in the land of the mermaid. After weeks of whispered words like "bloodbath" around Starbucks headquarters and gossip sites, the coffee giant announced today just how large this round of lay-offs will be. Today's cuts will affect 1,000 employees, 180 of them located in Seattle at Starbucks HQ or the regional office. This comes hot on the heels of news that Starbucks will be closing 616 under-performing stores and that the......

In a landmark settlement that brings to an end four decades of NBA basketball in the Emerald City, the City of Seattle has accepted a $75 million buyout from the Supersonics to release the team from the remaining two years of the club's lease at Key Arena. In addition to the cash payment, the city will also retain the "Supersonics" name and the franchise history, which could be applied to a future franchise. The......

The justice system may buckle in Oklahoma City’s favor this afternoon with results of the Sonics trial set to be announced at 4 p.m., but the wrath of God is clearly on Seattle’s side. Former owner Howard Schultz—the vindictive baby who sold to an ownership group intent on immediate relocation after being denied a taxpayer handout—is already feeling the sting of what is sure to be the first in a long line of curses......

Rat City Rollergirls by Seattlest Flickr contributor Scott Engelhardt Rat City Rollergirls have faced some seriously tough competition in their quest to become champions of the roller derby circuit, but the local team may be facing their toughest competitor to date--off the track. The current battle pits Rat City Rollergirls vs. the Starbucks Corporation in the legal arena, rather than an old hangar at Magnuson Park. At stake in the battle is no trophy or......

What was that about getting back to making the perfect latte? Starbucks announced today that they are debuting two new, non-coffee beverages. The company unveiled their plans in an interview with the Wall Street Journal. The new drinks you will be able to buy, instead of the delicious tasty disappearing breakfast sandwiches? According to the article, one of the new drinks will be a "smoothie-like drink made of fruit and whey." The new blended......

"Discovering Music" by Seattlest Flickr Contributor Seattle Rainscreen As part of Starbucks returning to their "It's the coffee, stupid!" business plan, they have handed over the day-to-day operations of their record label, Hear Music, to Concord Music. Regarding the change, Starbucks Chairman Howard Schultz said, "Now is the appropriate time to restructure our entertainment business to better align our efforts with our overall business strategies." Now Starbucks' partner in the record industry, Concord Music,......

Even though some of us around the Seattlest newsroom like to beat up on little ol’ Starbucks whenever the opportunity arises, today’s news that Starbucks' stock dropped like a hockey puck of used espresso knocked out of a porta-filter didn’t put a spring in the steps of all us Seattlests. No. Some of us actually own stock in the company (as do, we assume, some of you considering how many people in Seattle worked for......

Is it a felony to advocate semi-civil disobedience? If not, the few remaining souls tough enough to stomach the funeral that is the Sonics last home game this Sunday should consider storming the court or at the very least burn former owner Howard Schultz in effigy outside. Emphasis on should. After considerable soul-searching, we’ve determined getting arrested on a Sunday evening doesn’t exactly fit into our end of weekend plans, but we have no......

Seattle needs a Wall of Shame. A board of reckoning, publicly reminding the region’s powerful that all sins won’t be forgiven. Ideally located on the city tour circuit—not unlike the Fremont Troll, except political and mean-spirited in nature. It would read like a who’s who of area scumbags, present and past. Ken Behring, A-Rod, Mayor Nickels, the Niketown rioter wearing Nikes, Senator Ted Stevens, any company responsible for an area Superfund site, you get......

It cannot be easy, being green, shade-grown and responsible. It cannot be easy, being the butt of endless Dunkin Donuts commercials. It cannot be easy, watching McDonalds roll out espresso machines. It cannot be easy, being Starbucks. Evangelist-in-chief Howard Schultz roundly denies that Starbucks is losing its way. "Our best days are ahead of us," he says. To prove it, an extravagant product launch of a new blend, Pike Place (named for the company's......

"I humbly recognize and share both your concern and your disappointment in how the company has performed and how that has affected your investment in Starbucks," Schultz told investors. "I promise you this will not stand." So spake Howard Schultz at the annual shareholder meeting. Then he announced the solution: Starbucks is buying Clover, a Ballard company that makes coffee machines. And they'll maybe start serving energy drinks. Not enough. Schultz--like Bush--doesn't seem to......

The other day, (probably) the most read and best sports columnist in the country, ESPN.com's Bill Simmons, asked Sonic fans to send him emails venting their frustrations over the current "situation." The result was the longest piece he's ever posted. As we read all the emails, we went through many emotions, sadly none were close to joy. Ultimately (after we stopped throwing things), we were comforted that our fellow fans understood the situation so clearly--the......

At the Starbucks in our West Seattle neighborhood this morning, a (chronically inattentive) cashier and a (disarmingly friendly) barista had the following exchange. Guess which employee is which. SBUX employee #1 (apropos of nothing): I hope Starbucks is coughing up pizza tonight. SBUX employee #2 (with a hint of sarcasm): Uh, that is incorrect. But Starbucks will be coughing up a bunch of espresso shots. SBUX employee #1 (trailing off): Well, I’m going to......

So this gent orders the lasagna at the Capitol Hill Via Tribunali last week and LOVES it. Oh, says the waitress, we buy that from Sorrentino. Dude promptly finds out where Sorrentino is located (top of Queen Anne) and gets over there yesterday afternoon, is amazed to discover it's run by Mamma Enza, whom he met years ago when she was cooking at La Vita è Bella in Belltown. Big hugs all around. That amazing......

Coffee Angel photo by Seattlest Flickr Contributor, Jeff Carlson The world just might stop its rotation on February 26th. Seattle's coffee giant, Starbucks, has just announced that all 7,100 of its stores will close for three hours that day. Whatever shall we do? The recently returned CEO of Starbucks, Howard Schultz, made the announcement today. The three-hour closure will be spent retraining baristas nation-wide, in hopes of boosting sagging sales. Blessedly, it's not at......

In another effort by Chairman and Chief Executive Howard Schultz to "get back to the roots and the core of our heritage, which is the leading roaster of specialty coffee in the world," it's been reported that Starbucks will remove those tasty breakfast sammiches from their stores. The AP reports that, "The sandwiches, which will disappear by this fall, boost a typical store's annual revenue by $35,000, so pulling them off the menu will cost......

Howard Schultz is shaking things up. According to the Wall Street Journal, Starbucks is testing a $1 cup of drip coffee in some Seattle-area stores. The eight-ounce short size isn't on Starbucks's menu but has long been ordered by in-the-know patrons. Typically, a short, brewed coffee would sell for around $1.50, although that can vary by several cents depending on the store. Starbucks is also testing the offer of free refills for traditional-brewed coffee......

When Starbucks announced last night that Howard Schultz was returning as CEO, they included his "agenda" in their news release. And like all business agendas (and breakfast pastries), it's puffy and larded with high-calorie, low-nutrition information. Example agenda item: "Re-igniting the emotional attachment with customers and restoring the connections customers have with Starbucks(R) coffee, brand, people and stores." Portfolio's Jack Flack goes through the list point by point and translates the jargon into somewhat-more-normal person......

...now they've snapped up Cranium, reports John Cook: Seattle board game maker Cranium has been sold to Hasbro for $77.5 million. The company had raised about $36 million in venture capital from TPG Venture Group, Raycliff Capital, Peterson Capital, Quad Venture Partners and Maveron, the venture capital firm founded by Starbucks Chairman Howard Schultz and former investment banker Dan Levitan. Sales at the company slowed in 2006, prompting a 20 percent cutback in the work......

Stealing Seattle's basketball team apparently isn't keeping Sonics owner Aubrey McClendon busy, so he's found another community to screw over: tiny Saugatuck, Michigan. That's the Denison Dunes--413 acres of pristine shoreline where the Kalamazoo River meets Lake Michigan. Saugatuck's citizens have long wanted to add the land to an adjacent state park, but McClendon has other plans--building a gated community for millionaires. The Concerned Citizens for Saugatuck State Park lament:Mr. McClendon, with the resources of......

Sonics minority owner Aubrey McClendon confirms what we all suspected from the start. In an interview with the Oklahoma City Journal Record, he says:We didn’t buy the team to keep it in Seattle; we hoped to come here. McClendon, who previously got bad publicity in Seattle for being anti gay rights, lauds Clay Bennett for "artfully and skillfully" (translation: underhandedly) getting the team. Here's the full quote:We started to look around, and at that time......

Mayor Greg Nickels told reporters yesterday he thought Key Arena was a great place for basketball, and if the Sonics would just pony up $100 million, the city would be willing to renovate it to match the team's needs. Sonics owner Clay Bennett's response was swift and unequivocal.We have been clear since July 18, 2006, the day the sale of the Sonics and Storm was announced, that KeyArena is not an option as a future......

Save Our Sonics and Citizens For More Important Things' Chris Van Dyk are working together to keep NBA basketball in the city…until 2010. Owner Clay Bennett is going to try and move the team to Oklahoma City at the end of the season, even though the team has a lease with the city that runs through 2010. Bennett could buy his way out of the lease; a prospect that the city may like considering that......

In June of 1996, Shawn Kemp had just outplayed Michael Jordan, and even the most pessimistic Sonics fan agreed that the Supes had been a healthy Nate McMillan away from taking the crown. The awful aftertaste of the Denver upset was gone. With a 28-year-old Gary Payton and a 27-year-old Shawn Kemp--two sure hall-of-famers--in their primes, and a solid surrounding cast, the Sonics were ready to dominate the NBA for a few years. Our window......

True Hoop's been running a fascinating serial written by Gregory Dole, who was Leandro Barbosa's interpreter when he worked out with NBA teams before the 2003 draft. Part IV talks about Barbosa's work out with the Sonics, wherein he wowed the top of the Sonics' org chart, including then-poobah Howard Schultz. Barbosa had a great workout, hitting his shots, blowing past defenders, and unleashing a nasty crossover that caused Kirk Hinrich to fall on his......