It's Wednesday, which means we'll have to sit down for American Idol results tonight (after getting home from the Ani DiFranco show) without any local hottie to be nervous for. It's probably for the best. It's Andrew Lloyd Webber week, after all, and Kristy Lee Cook was supposedly planning on doing "Don't Cry For Me Argentina." That would probably not have gone very well, if the other Cook's creepy performance of "Music of the Night"......

Somehow we were shocked last night when our stupid friend who finds these things out ahead of time let it slip that Kristy Lee Cook would be eliminated from American Idol. We're not sure why we were so shocked. We'd speculated about her elimination for weeks. For weeks, she made us scratch our head as she delivered mediocre-to-bad performance after mediocre-to-bad performance. But then we kind of fell in love with her ability to......

Oh boy. It started very badly. We thought we might have to toss a shoe at the TV just to make it stop. But then something magical happened. Kristy Lee Cook sang the CRAP out of that Mariah Carey song. We learned recently that there are two camps among the American Idol contestants: those who have asked to be quarantined from any form of media wherein their performance or other aspects of their existence might......

Our friend with whom we were watching this week's installment of How Eight People Slaughter Good Songs noted that Kristy Lee was one of the only people on American Idol who didn't do something to make us angry. In fact, she seriously brought it this week (if you can forgive one or two pitchy moments in a 90-second version of a Martina McBride song). KLC's choice: "Anyway." As of this blogging, Dial Idol has Kristy......

It could've gone either way last night. Lord knows, in American Idol history, rockers have been labeled rockers only to blow rock week, country singers blow country week, R&B singers blow disco....but not this year, nosiree. Kristy Lee Cook, who our friends have started calling this year's Sanjaya-in-waiting, delivered on country week. The mentor was Dolly Parton—the nicest woman on the planet. She was even nice to Ramiele, who clearly didn't bring it on her......

Okay, granted it was a song we hate, but we're glad we held out some hope for Kristy Lee Cook so long. She finally picked the perfect song for her. As Simon noted, "God Bless the USA" was a very interesting song choice. It will nail her the veteran vote, the redneck vote, the rural vote. We feel confident that, if Hillary could sing like that on that song, she would nail the nomination. But,......

Well, America, it's starting to look like Kristy Lee is the new Sanjaya, albeit with about 100 times more actual talent. She keeps winding up in the bottom two or three, and then getting spared. We're not sure how much longer that can possibly go on, but we're happy to keep filling you in on the drama. First off, a note about this week's bottom three. In our opinion, the three worst performances were given......

It was Lennon/McCartney Songbook night on Idol last night, and our quasi-local cutie pulled out a country version of "8 Days a Week." She looked nervous and uncertain of how it was going to go, despite her vocal prowess, which wound up iffy as a result. Witness: She looked super cute, of course, but then she opened her mouth and it wasn't stellar. It wasn't hideous, as Cowell called it, but it wasn't stellar. And,......

We're not really nutty about most of the American Idol contestants this year. We're pretty convinced cutiepie David Archuleta will win the whole thing, but he's not from here, so who cares? That kid is so incredible, we wonder what's in the water in his small Utah town. Paula wants to hang him from her rearview mirror, and we don't blame her. However, we're going to keep on keeping our eye on pretty-haired Selma, Ore.,......