Results tagged “biglebowski”

Former Christ Jim Caviezel received minor injuries yesterday after being thrown from his motorcycle on I-97, all because some guy tossed a bicycle into his path. Caviezel was taken to Cascade Medical Center for treatment of cuts and bruises and was later released (thank God for his helmet). Washington State Troopers plan to forward their investigation to the Chelan County prosecutor's office for possible assault and reckless endangerment charges against a 42-year-old Wenatchee man, identified as David Nelson. There's no indication why Nelson threw the bike into the path of Caviezel's 2006 Harley Davidson, especially since it's common knowledge that nobody fucks with the Jesus.

The justice system may buckle in Oklahoma City’s favor this afternoon with results of the Sonics trial set to be announced at 4 p.m., but the wrath of God is clearly on Seattle’s side.

Kids have been getting shafted by disputes between their parents since the first caveman hired an attorney to protect his rock collection after breaking it off with the cavewoman. Or at least since the 70s--same difference. But there's a kid down in Oly who's about to suffer above and beyond what most casualties of divorce go through. His father has converted to Judaism (we're picturing Goodman in The Big Lebowski) and wants his son to convert as well. The son has agreed--although maybe "agreed" should have quotes around it because a twelve-year-old can't really disagree with much that his legal care-giver decides--to also convert to Judaism, even though one of the stipulations is that he gets circumcised.

BASKETBALL: It's a battle for first place in Kingco's Mountain Division when Roosevelt hosts Redmond.

"The bums will always lose!"

It's the end of an era. Check out the standings list below and you'll see "Hüsker Don't," as you might expect -- but you'll see them in third place. Ever-renamed team State of the Onion played Nancy Zerg to HD's Ken Jennings, as did comeback kids Thaiku Hookers, who took second place.

Amazon is celebrating its tenth anniversary with a curious promotion: for a limited time, selected customers will get their booty delivered by none other than a celebrity related to the item ordered. Then--in a twist that could only make us think of those Publisher's Clearing House commercials where the mortified new millionaire answers the door in curlers and a bathrobe--Amazon webcasts the magic moment.