This Week in Seattle Cinema: Better Living Through Mockery
One of the most admirable things about film is the sheer flexibility of the artform: not just for the producers, but for spectators, who unwittingly bring their own culmination of experiences and perspectives along for the ride. This vital interaction can manifest itself in all sorts of ways, whether it be an intellectual response, an emotional outburst or just maniacal, shocked laughter at godawful crap. I'm not entirely sure why this time of year seems so rich with top-grade schlock, but there are quite a few cinematic trainwrecks out there promising a theatre-going experience that's... memorable. Here are three awesomely bad films playing in Seattle theaters this week that you won't want to miss (although I can't properly articulate why).
Dana Gould Presents Plan 9 From Outer Space
SIFF Cinema at the Uptown (12/8, 7pm)
Come see the milestone in shitty movie history that people watched ironically before watching things ironically was cool: Ed Wood's Plan 9 From Outer Space. Co-presented by The People's Republic of Komedy, the truly noxious science fiction legend will be handled carefully by trustworthy professionals. Not only will stand-up comedy veteran Dana Gould attempt to serve as besieged tour guide to the movie's madness, but he will receive plenty of back-up snark by way of bona fide Mystery Science Theater 3000/Cinematic Titanic alumni in Trace Beaulieu and Frank Conniff. Join in on this one-of-a-kind presentation this Thursday, in what also just may be the Uptown Theatre's first substantial dose of live improv.
Saint
Grand Illusion Cinema (Tonight & 12/9, 11pm)
Whether it's a fascination with Christmas' pagan roots or the obvious symbolism for the ruthlessness of holiday consumerism, one thing is for sure: there sure have been a lot of movies made about Killer Santa Clauses. Saint is the one of the newest additions into the Santa Murdering People pantheon, a Dutch production that came out in 2010 -- not to be confused with Rare Exports, the Finnish Killer Santa Claus movie released in the same year. Saint also touts the tagline "Santa's come to slay," which means it's also not to be confused with America's 2005 entry, Santa's Slay, when pro wrestler Bill Goldberg filled the blood-drenched white beard and pompom hat. It's nice to know in a time of such dismal global uncertainty, America and Europe can still stand united in its insatiable need to see holiday icons unleash all manners of grisly death upon their respective countrymen.
Jack and Jill
Meridian 16 (12/3-12/9)
No, I'm not being serious, please do NOT see Jack and Jill. Stay far, far away.
