Between 18 and 26? Drunk? Need an extra $5k?
This is going to be the best Christmas ever! Girls Gone Wild, famous (mostly) softcore, barely-(mostly) legal porn and free swag purveyor, is coming to our fair city at some undisclosed time, according to this Craigslist ad slipped under the radar over the Thanksgiving weekend.
The catch? Well, aside from being a part of Joe Francis's charming, fratboy empire, "the competition is fierce, and only the dirtiest and nastiest get the spots."
The dirtiest and the nastiest? As esteemed colleague Alex says, "These people are the internet smut equivalent of TV evangelists. All promise, no result." While they supposedly welcome the dirtiest and the nastiest, we're sure anything involving a toothless hooker would not be getting us $5k. Neither would a video of ladies in sweats messily consuming bag upon bag of potato chips, getting the crumbs everywhere while hurtling insults at the TV, like the dirty, nasty girls they are. Anything involving menses we would also imagine is a no-go. Citizens of Seattle, we encourage you--no, implore you--to call their bluff.
Oh, and if you hit the right kind of dirty/nasty on the proverbial head, you might be able to have a relaxing getaway on Girls Gone Wild Island. It's like the Playboy Mansion, only an island. Times are tough, and you need a vacation. Get those tight economic behinds in gear!
