Hold On To Your Specs

There's an eyeglasses fetishist loose on Capitol Hill! Seattle 911 alerts us that a witness to Saturday night's eyeglasses theft at Neighbours says the suspect has stolen nine pairs of cheaters before. Nine coke-bottles taken does not a fetish make, so we're not sure where that part of Seattle 911's article came from, but it's a funny picture: some white, 140 lb. man with bleached hair sitting on the floor at home, surrounded by nine pairs of trendy-framed spectacles, increasingly excited by the idea that nine people are now more blind than they were before he snatched their goggles. Some therapist is gonna love that one.