Stop The Presses, We've Got A Honey Problem

The P-I's big, splashy story today is on the crucial problem of "honey laundering," a horrific pun which made us snicker and then cry a little bit. The issue is that certain nefarious companies are shipping sub-par and potentially contaminated honey out of China on its way to the U.S. markets, stopping at intermediary shipping points (Vietnam, for instance) to alter the documents to make it look like said honey didn't actually come from China. The sweet goods are then slipped across our borders, where the P-I's investigation showed that officials can be less than hyper-vigilant about inspections. People might get sick. The other point of interest is that apparently the FDA has no legal definition for honey. (Seriously? Form a committee at once.)

If we didn't know better, we'd think this article was a parody. Check this out, it reads like a Nancy Drew installment:

A far cry from the innocent image of Winnie the Pooh with a paw stuck in the honey pot, the international honey trade has become increasingly rife with crime and intrigue. ... The business is plagued by foreign hucksters and shady importers who rip off conscientious U.S. packers with honey diluted with sugar water or corn syrup -- or worse, tainted with pesticides or antibiotics.

"Foreign hucksters"?

A honey transshipping scandal is worth a five-month investigation and tripartite series of articles from our local daily? It's not like we're at war or have major international crises (300 dead in Gaza) dominating global news, or that we--to stay local and ports-specific--have a human trafficking problem on our hands. (SPD has one officer dedicated to human trafficking. All is well.) Certainly we don't have a gang problem. But okay. Investigation of these issues obviously takes a back seat to sticky sweet Sue Bee. It's not that we're saying honey laundering isn't a problem; it's just that this huge set of articles is sensationalizing the issue.

That said, until all is sorted out, buy local and you'll bee (*groan*) fine, safe from the illegal antibiotics that might make you sick. Or buy darker, stronger honey from Vietnam; that's not the marketable white honey the shady foreigners are pretending isn't from China.