Booze In, Coffee Out As Affordable Luxury Of Choice

Starbucks may be having difficulties, but the liquor industry is doing just fine, thank you very much. Washington state liquor sales are up five percent this year, a statistic owed (we suspect) in large part to the contributions of all the laid-off Starbucks employees. After all, a latte may wake you up, but a whiskey-laced latte will wake you up to a world much softer than the world in which you fell asleep. Perhaps it's time to stimulate the economy by buying stock in Grey Goose. We would never suggest partaking in illegal activities, but we're certain now would be a lucrative time to get busy making moonshine. You could peddle it right outside Starbucks Corporate! (There are rumors of fast-approaching Microsoft lay-offs, too...supply and demand, people.)