Seahawks (2-8) vs Cooking (Ham with Glaze)

This fall we are combining our love of the football and our dream of learning to cook by preparing a meal from the city of the Seahawks' opponent.

As we’ve mentioned before, we are the world’s pickiest eater, but there is one food that we love the pants off of, ham.

Sweet Jesus, do we love ham. When we go to the deli counter to buy our lunch meat for the week, we stare at the piles of ham and imagine that we are on a beach somewhere stuffing our face and drinking wine coolers.

From what we’ve come to understand, ham is grown in Virginia, which will fill in for D.C. this weekend.

We have had a problem finding a good meal for Washington D.C. before; however, the Redskins have a large fan base in Northern Virginia, because, well, you can walk to the state from the Lincoln Memorial.

Hey, remember in the election when McCain desperately needed to win Virginia, so they had his brother call everyone a communist, and then sent a spokesperson on the TV to let people in Northern Virginia know that they weren’t real Virginians because they didn’t say racial slurs directly into a camera?

What were they thinking with that strategy?

Virginia hams are borrowed from the inside of razorback hogs that are fed all kinds of sweet things to eat, like peaches. Wait, they start to marinate the meat while the pig is still alive? We don’t know whether to be impressed or horrified.

People started get all excited about Virginia ham when the whiteys first came to Virginia hundreds of years ago. They brought pigs with them, and started producing ham that blew people’s sacks sideways. One New World settler reported, "Virginia ham was as good as any in Westphalia." Wow, you know that had to piss off the folks in Gelsenkirchen.