BLACK MONDAY: Good God! Have you been following what's going on in the banking sector? We're closing our WaMu accounts as fast as we can and switching to WSECU before our Wamoola goes the same way as the investors in Lehman Bros. Wait...is that how bank runs start? Shit. Anyway, if ever there was a good day for drinking, it's today. Which is why Seattlest is happy to host a Moe Bar happy hour tonight from five to eight p.m. Come by and enjoy free financial advice from just-this-side-of-homeless Seattlest contributors, spinning fanciful webs of cheap liquor-fueled disinformation and plain old bad advice for your amusement.

5-8 p.m. // Moe Bar, 925 E. Pike // free entry; $2 drink specials // 21+

WOBEGOTTEN DAY: Garrison Keillor's career is a mystery to us. Can a down-home Minnesotan accent really get you this far as a humorist? Whatever. Plenty of people love him, and if you're one of those people, we're not going to be seeing you tonight because you'll be at Town Hall seeing him read from his new Wobegone novel, Liberty. Tickets are all of $5, available at the door, or probably you can still get them at Elliott Bay Books.

7:30 p.m. // Town Hall, 1119 Eighth Ave. // $5

ELLIOTT SMITH REDUX: Do you like wispy voiced singer-songwriters with the chops to get signed to Kill Rock Stars? Of course you do! Such is the appeal of Mr. Jeff Hanson, who will be pumping up crowds at Chop Suey tonight for his new release, Madam Owl. Also joining him are Krist Krueger (of Southerly) and John Totten (of the Quiet Ones).

8 p.m. // Chop Suey, 1325 E. Madison // $6, 21+

Moe Bar pic by Seattlest Flickr group contributor lorilovesyouu, who we'll hopefully be seeing tonight!