"Bona Fide, Electrified, Monorail Station" by Seattlest Flickr contributor David Hogan

Engineers will be filling the easily-laughed-at but fiercely-protected monorail with kegs. A keg party on the monorail--sounds promising or at the very least, nauseating. Getting drunk on a monorail that goes nowhere--it could be the hippest new theme bar or some tragic Seattle metaphor. Sadly, it is neither.

The kegs will be filled with water, not fine local microbrews, and will be used to test the structural soundness of the recently repaired blue line. The filled kegs are meant to mimic the weight of passengers, without endangering actual people if those tests prove the Monorail's blue line still isn't ready to run safely. We're hoping the Monorail passes all its tests. The only thing sadder than a two-tracked Monorail that goes nowhere is a one-track Monorail that does the same. Unless it's an animated one, on The Simpsons-- then it's hilarious.