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Poor Michelle Malkin. Barely a month went by after declaring her break-up with Starbucks—after a 10-year relationship starting in Seattle—in favor of Dunkin' Donuts, before her new caffeine paramour ran afoul of her sensibilities. Equally culpable in this Foolish Fracas is some other website's post mistaking the time-honored, free-market practice of appropriating culture to turn a quick buck for the alleged mainstreaming of (a generic and varied regional) symbol used by some (in a particular subset of that region) in a violent context. In follow-up posts, Ms. Malkin has dubbed this the "Keffiyeh Kerfuffle." Such clever words given her inability to distinguish a cheap, tacky, paisley-print, fringed scarf from the real thing.
—Mr. St. Hubbins just called the office to remind us: "it's such a fine line between clever and stupid."
Naturally, all Ms. Malkin and her compatriots had to do was to simply fart muse out loud about the possible effects of a hypothetical boycott and Dunkin' Donuts rolled immediately. This is to be expected from the same ignorant rubes who appeal to the mouth-breathing peanut gallery's opposition to ordering in Fritalian because...um...exposure to foreign-sounding words will dilute the purity and essence of our precious English language—like the word latte which "you order in English" and apparently spell I-R-O-N-I-C.
Daniel Goldblum, writing in the National Post sums it up well:
That Ms. Malkin and other conservative bloggers flipped out is not surprising—it's pretty much the only thing some of these commentators do. But Malkin et al. pulled the fashion equivalent of confusing the American flag with the Cuban one. True, they both have red and white stripes with at least one blue-ensconced white star, but no one is accusing hyper-patriotic Americans of supporting the Castro regime.It is continually amazing to watch these pundits foam at the mouth at the mention of anything vaguely Palestinian. The notion that mere association with a national group is cause for condemnation at the very least borders on racism. I shudder to think what will happen when commentators find out that Bethlehem—the birthplace of Jesus himself—is actually in Palestine.
Cheeky words coming from a Canadian. Canada, as you may recall, is that nation whose flag has an awful lot of red in it, if you catch our rightward drift. But this isn't about the socialists next door. Back to Ms. Malkin.
Heading this post is a publicity photo we found on the net (source: CAIR).You'll notice the smashing combination of red and black that she is wearing here. It is a bold combination of which we are personally fond; it asserts just the right amount of authority when giving presentations. But the color red. Disturbing, no? We ran out to the Seattlest (collective) farm out back, scooped up a fresh pile of "fuel," and fired up the old Malkin Simulator in the office. Here's what it pooped out:
Red, for the clueless, is the traditional color of Communism that has come to symbolize murderous Marxist regimes. Popularized by Bolshevik aparatchiks and a regular adornment of Maoist revolutionaries appearing in striking paintings and charmingly-period propaganda, the color has been mainstreamed by both ignorant (and not so ignorant) fashion designers, celebrities and bloviating bloggers.
Now, whether or not the keffiyeh has been subverted by militants to the same point that, say, swastikas have, or whether they have been co-opted by consumerist culture are questions we'll leave to more intrepid cultural warriors, the straw men who'll show in comments, and members of our own Armed Forces. Maybe instead of listening to frothing pundits, a better answer comes from a cross-section of actual, informed people to whom the garment is indigenous.
In the meanwhile, we are as shocked as you are, dear reader, by Ms. Malkin's brazen Communist sympathies. There's no place for this in post-Reagan America! And don't even get us started on the stodgy tyranny of neo-classicist architecture as symbolized by the Grecian columns behind Ms. Malkin. Is she now a Big Gub'mint shill? One thing we do know is that in post-1980s America, paisley must never come back into style. We may not agree with your Pinko politics, but thank you, Ms. Malkin, for fighting this sartorial scourge.
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Tom, you've made my morning. I thank you.
Who cares?
What up, Seattlest! Just wanted to bring this post from Sadly, No! to yr attention. Malkin apparently has her own dark kaffiyeh appropriating past.
Love from the District,
DCist Jason
Michelle is a serious journalist and she brings really important issues to the forefront. God bless her honesty and integrity.