If You Don't Go See West Side Story at the Fifth Avenue, You Are a Dumbass

You've heard this: Pizza is like sex: even when it's bad, it's still pretty good. Same with West Side Story. When the music's by Bernstein and the story's by Shakespeare, you could cast Tone Loc and Rhea Perlman in the leads and still have something great.

The 5th Avenue Theater's production of West Side Story is better than just good sex--it's a fingers-gripped-around-the-headboard, eyes-rolled-back-in-head latex buster.

And just like amazing sex, we had...

Goosebumps
When Tony (Louis Hobson) and Maria (Maegan McConnell) meet for the first time. Not "ooh-look-at-my-arm" goosebumps--shivers from our ankle to our scalp.

Smiles
When the company nails "Gee, Officer Krupke." Not the tight smile you give to a co-worker in the hallway, but a broad, irrepressible grin.

Watery Eyes
At the end sniffles all around, and watery eyes for us, an emotion we usually reserve for Jeff Weaver starts, which is pretty impressive considering that everyone knows how this one ends (kind of like a Jeff Weaver start!)

A few words about the leads. Hobson (who we interviewed last month) sets the tone for the show with a wonderfully-phrased version of "Something's Coming." He captures the nervous anticipation of the lyric perfectly.

McConnell has a voice like an opera singer, she pulls off comedy and drama well. She's a star. And she knocks the holy shit out of "There's A Place For Us." We're serious here, people, this is some world-class stuff going on.

The 5th Avenue just added two new performances of the locally-produced show. Here's the full ticket lowdown. Drop the 24-75 bucks, it's worth it.

Photo: Chris Bennion