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Carrie Underwood, You Three-Timing Slut

trianglburquad.JPGLet's hope Carrie Underwood doesn't have some virulent STD, or the entire NFL season may have to be canceled.

When last we saw Carrie, she'd spurned our own Josh Brown for then-Cowboys-savior Tony Romo.

Nice choice, Carrie--Josh Brown is now a franchise player, while Tony Romo is going to be forever linked to a debate about ball rubbing.

Obviously the right thing to do here is beg Brown to take her back. But no--instead of sharing champagne in front of a warm fire while watching the rain pitter-pat on Brown's Issaquah porch--now Underwood's in NYC, taping Saturday Night Live with...Peyton Manning.

What is it about helmets and hip pads with this chick?

Whatever. Good luck with Peyton Manning--we're sure you'll enjoy doing the do with him, as he pulls out every few seconds and hand signals to Marvin Harrison to switch the music to R&B or adjust the Craftmatic.

Who needs you anyway? Josh Brown's got a new crop of American Idol contestants to choose from--including that slender minx Sanjaya.

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Comments [rss]

  • Jason

    Rebecca, you clearly don't know Seth.



    He'd LOVE for people on the internet to post that he was a slut. He's pretty much a masochist.

  • rebecca

    Does it matter who carrie is dating its her choice and i doubt she's a three timing slut i mean she sed her nd romo are just friends also MANNING IS MARRIED and BROWN IS HER AQUAINTANCE NOT FRIEND

    so you people posting this shit need to get a life coz im not bein funny but you wouldnt like shit like this being posted about u !

  • Party Fernandez

    Brett....you're a weiner.

  • Jason

    Brett, I'm impressed at your swagger.



    It takes a pretty big pair to call out a "computer nerd" on the internet.



    Maybe you should leave your address or something, in order to give Seattlest Seth the chance to say something like that.



    As an observer, I'd love to read about that encounter.



    Cheers,

    Jason

  • Jason

    Brett, I'm impressed at your swagger.



    It takes a pretty big pair to call out a "computer nerd" on the internet.



    Maybe you should leave your address or something, in order to give Seattlest Seth the chance to say something like that.



    As an observer, I'd love to read about that encounter.



    Cheers,

    Jason

  • Brett

    Hey,



    You're pretty brave slandering people from the safety of your chair at your computer.



    Let's see how funny it is to say something like that in my presence. I will kick your computer nerd ass.



    F'ing loser

  • hunh?

    Virulent STD'S are very manageable nowadays. Can anyone say Ron Mexico? Doubtful the season would be canceled. Valtrex could even start working on those endorsement deals.

  • Felicity

    ^^^^^^^^To Kayla: CARRIE IS NOT I REPEAT IS NOT DATING JOSH BROWN, TONY ROMO, OR PEYTON MANNING BFOR THE FOLLOWING REASONS:

    1. ROMO AND HER ARE ONLY FRIENDS AS THEY BOTH CONFIRMED

    2. MANNING IS MARRIED

    3. BROWN IS HER AQUAINTANCE NOT FRIEND



    THERE YOU HAVE IT. THIS ARTICLE IS BS

  • Kayla

    Carrie, your one of my favorite singers........how could you let me down like this? Me and my kids wanted to meet you in person at your next concert, but I don't quite know if that would happen at ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Felicity

    You people are all idiots. Does it matter whos she's dating? C'mon guys, get a life.

  • Jenna

    wow you are all soooo wrong!

  • Carrie pOOPS

    hey rebecca. the last time i heard carrie underwood, i had to poop so bad i got feces all over my thighs. i really appreciate your intelligent comment at the end. "If i was carrie underwood and i saw this i wouldnt be to happy." maybe you should write a song for her and email it to her, cause its not like she writes her own stuff anyways.



    Suggested song titles (many of these are being direct quotes from your litany of Carrie loving)



    Track 1: Carrie Rocks (cocks)

    Track 2: YOU ARE A LOSER!



    I also hear your girl "KaCe" backing you up, saying Seth couldn't go to 1st base with Carrie if he tried. thanks for the reality check, cause last time i looked, seth was salivating over his latest plot to find the ever elusive entrance into carrie underwood's pants.



    since noone else has noticed, id also like to take this chance to point out the whiteness of every nfl player carrie has rocked. maybe she should mix it up a little, try someone with a little pigment every now and then...may i suggest jerramy stevens?

  • Max1259

    nice article, Seth. i really appreciate the dead honesty and seriousness of it all. if you dont like this article, you obviously dont like free speech. DEMOCRACY BABY. OOO O OO OOOOOOOOOoooooo

  • Crissa

    You Seattlest's need to calm down. Can you blame her for NOT chosing Josh Brown??! One, he's a KICKER,the woossiest position in Football. Two, he's ugly. Sorry. Three, he plays for the SEAHWAKS...hello shes a COWBOYS fan! And uh Peyton is married and Eli just got engaged so shes not interested in either one of them. And shes not a slut. Thats bogus. You people need to get a life just cuz she doesent like your Josh Brown does not make her a slut: It makes her SMART.

  • Donald

    Yes Payton is married, but didn't you notice brother Eli in the crowd? Hmm, makes ya wonder.

  • Rebecca

    This is sooo out of order Carrie is not a slut ! and its up to her who she wants to have a relationship with.

    dont listen to everything the press has to say anyway they see something and what they see is actually the opposite to what they wrote down on paper.

    carrie is a down to earth girl and desreves better than this !!

    Carrie rocks. Anyone who calls her a slut is begging to be shot, plain and simple. Its carries life let her live it.

    And another thing, Carrie is ANYTHING BUT PLAIN! How many awards has she won this year? Hell, how many has she won in her first couple years as a musician? How many of her singles so far have NOT reached #1 on any of the charts? I also believe she has sold over 4 million copies of her album thus far (X4 Platinum), making her the best-selling American Idol for their debut album. OH, BUT SHE'S PLAIN! You know nothing!

    Carrie is a two-timing slut!" Well guess what lowlife? YOU ARE A LOSER.

    Looks like she is so sucessful that people have to start stuff so they get attention. well they need to back off. and good luck carrie and don't let low-lives like these people put you down. Carrie should date who ever she wants no matter what the media says!!

    Well it turns out she isn't dating any of them so just leave it out !!

    what is it with people slating carrie underwood have you guys got nothing better to do. who ever posted this shit are all a bunch of morons who really do need to get a life. If i was carrie underwood and i saw this i wouldnt be to happy.

    people like you piss me off !!





  • Diana

    Who is this moron that wrote this article? Last time I looked we were in America and women could date who they wanted. Sounds to me like the "writer" has female issues, besides being a moron. If it was supposed to be funny, it isnt.

  • KaCe



    This article is nothing less than slanderous, irresponsible 'journalism'--Peyton Manning is happily married and hosting SNL, with his family in the audience. Carrie met Tony for the first time at Christmas and has expressed to her own fan site that it is a platonic friendship; and if she did date him, well they are both single and come from good families. Josh Brown is a casual acquaintance of Carrie's and she thinks he is a sweet Okie. Slandering her reputation is vile and totally shows a jealous predisposition, probably because, Seth is it, could not get to first base with Carrie if he tried, due to his 'ungentle man-like' conduct!

  • Kels

    The only funny part is Josh and Sangaya. That I could see happening. Josh can kick a football but who couldn't if they practiced just that for hours every day? He's still ugly as homemade soap.

  • Jan Coulson

    How stupid are you people. This borders on nasty...and moronic....NOT funny. I guess I know now what the "Seattlest" is.....another stupid, lying, moronic rag.

  • frank

    uh oh. another carrie underwood post that's gonna ruffle peoples feather.

  • bewildered

    nice. seattlest management: can we get the misogynist pricks off here?

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