American Football Spectacular: Niner Hope Unlooked-For In 2006
Yesterday some guys from SFist emailed about a bet of some kind they wanted to make. When the Seahawks beat the 'Niners on Thursday night we'd get to post some gloating thing on their site. That was the gist of it. Well, it blew up in our faces, in play-by-play form, no less. Here's SFist Christopher Rogers reporting for Seattlest:
Holy fancy baby Jesus on a Kaiser roll, the 49ers beat the Seahawks? In storm conditions in Seattle?!
Wow. This was unforeseen.
That's a sweep of the division series on the year, keeping the Niners' tiiiny window of playoff chance alive. How could this have happened? Here's how:
The whole enterprise began with all sorts of foreboding against SF, what with the weather knocking out power in parts of Seattle's stadium, and walls of water descending on the field.
As expected, the same 49er problems that've been going on all year manifested: couldn't convert 3rd down and couldn't harangue the opposing quarterback.
As the game began, the Seahawks were able to complete passes at will, despite the rain continuing to come down strong.
As he stood wet but unscathed, QB Matt Hasselbeck just kept feeding WR D.J. Hackett over and over. It was teeth-grittingly frustrating to watch.
The 49er secondary had a couple hobbled DBs, a few safeties playing out of position, and were more talent-thin than American Idol.
And the Niners' offense? Three-and-out, three-and-out went the mantra. The Seahawks did the sensible thing and brought the safeties allll the way up to the line, flatly daring QB Alex Smith to throw the ball through the wind 'n rain.
Smith notched his first completion with 2:12 remaining in the first quarter. Seattle had already completed five passes by that point.
Then San Francisco center Eric Heitmann's leg snapped, and they showed on TV. That was the opposite of good.
As he diced through the Niner D, it came to mind that watching RB Shaun Alexander run is odd. He doesn't run like you'd expect a man his size to run. Rather, there is a delicacy to it. He knifes through defenses once he is into the second layer, using angles against his opponents as though playing Tecmo Super Bowl, 'til he leans his shoulder into the final man to reach him. It's as though he's working to persuade the ball through the defenders. The opposite of KC RB Larry Johnson's angry force-it-through-you style. Both forms are effective.
Back to the game: bare-armed DB dynamo Keith Lewis blocked the SEA punt, and this is the turning point, right? Wrong. Another three-and-out.
By this point the announcers were actively noting the statistical futility each time the Niners get the ball. Almost like they were the Raiders' offense or somethin'. Niner punter Andy Lee kept on trotting out to do his thing over and over again.
But it's a fake! Former Penn State QB Michael Robinson picks up a first down on a direct snap, and SEA Head Coach Mike Holmgren unsheathes his Look Of Withering Disgust from beneath his Gorton's-ish rain hood. This is the turning point we were looking for, right?
Wrong. So, Smith ran the ball down the sideline for a touchdown, but the play gets called back by penalty on RT Kwame Harris, as has been the case all season long.
Expletives splayed broadly across the American Football Spectacular notepad. "BRING ME HIS HEAD!!" was scrawled multiple times.
Former first round pick Harris' first name is pronounced "quaaahm" rather than "kwa-mi," but as our AFS Kansas City correspondent Kyle put it, "it should just be pronounced 'Crapbag.'" So shall it be henceforth in this column!
Crapbag's back-to-back penalties make difficult the scoring opportunity, and the Niners settled for three.
How the hell was it still so close? Why weren't the Seahawks just finishing off a team they were so utterly dominating? Where was that boot-on-the-neck drive?
At halftime it's seven to three?! Yo no comprende. How were the Niners still in the game?
Third quarter was more of the same. RB Frank Gore slamming into the middle for little to no yardage as the Hawks crammed the line. Gore's wristbands, which began the game on his elbows, slowly worked their way down his forearms to his wrists by game's end.
Three-and-out, three-and out. Seven three-and-outs total!
Then LB/DE Roderick Green actually touched Hasselbeck. A positive achievement.
Ultra-multi-purpose OLB Julian Peterson made the Niners regret letting him go by authoring a tremendous hit on a Gore catch for negative four yards, and on the next play making a jumpshot rejection on a Smith third down pass attempt. Yeah, we sure still could use that JP in San Francisco.
A marvelous endzone interception by SF safety Mark Roman came to nothing. Three-and-out. "The San Francisco Three-And-Outs," you might as well have called them at this point.
That made it eight-out-of-nine drives for San Francisco that became three-and-outs.
Here, in the third quarter, was when something changed. The Niner pass rushers began to reach an uncharacteristically slow-to-react Hasselbeck. Was that fatigue along the Seahawk offensive line? TE Jerramy Stevens dropped his third catchable pass of the game. And 49ers WR Arnaz Battle exchanged his black gloves for a fresh pair of red ones.
Late in that third quarter, the Niners finally got the ball to the long-striding WR Antonio Bryant, who converted a third down on his first catch of the game, but a penalty on the backup center pushed the ball back into the Niners' own territory.
Then, in one fell stroke, all the fruitless pounding from Gore paid off. Snap; a lean pumpfake from Smith and then he reared back and pulled a deep ball long across his frame down the right sideline. Battle flew past CB Kelly Herndon, whose body language displayed his disbelief at what was occurring. Battle ran under the pass at full speed, dove, and reeled the ball in, skidding along the wet turf with his prize.
Rising from Herndon's tackle with a smile, Battle waved his teammates onwards to the new ballspot at the Seattle 33-yard line with his bright red gloves.
Fifty-four yard pickup. The Niners were on the move.
Suddenly they were completing passes; Smith was making the right reads and running when he had to. Why was the playcalling working now? The haymaker had connected and suddenly, as the rain abandoned the stadium, the Seahawks were on their heels.
To finish the drive, first round pick TE Vernon Davis caught a touchdown and a 15-yard unsportsmanlike penalty for a petulant celebration. Only Crapbag was dumb enough to congratulate Vernon in the endzone after the prick-tacular bird dance that Davis did. The rest of the team turned back towards the bench.
On the ensuing kickoff, because of the penalty, WR Nate Burleson ran the ball back to the 49er 36-yard line.
Great, this is where the Seahawks go back to basics and re-seize control of the game, right?
One-yard run, eight-yard pass, no gain (Alexander), no gain (FB Mack Strong). When the chain measurement came, the Niners had held, and the boos rang through the stadium.
Niner ball. Now Frank Gore was finding more room among the tired SEA defenders. The yards began to come with running behind the huge left side of the o-line, especially Sonoma State's finest -- LG Larry Allen. Third downs were getting picked up. The Seattle defense was getting away from what had been so successful earlier, playing their safeties back to respect the pass. Offensive Coordinator Norv called for a reverse handoff to Battle, just for good measure, netting 18 yards.
A delay of game pushed the ball from a third-and-one to a third-and-five at the Seattle 20.
Back in shotgun, Smith never saw dark-visored Kelly Herdon blitzing from the right edge of the line until the last moment. Herdon hit Smith full-on, but Smith wrenched the defender from him, scrambled into the left flat and hit a sprawling Frank Gore tumbling into the endzone for the touchdown.
A shock ran though this 49er fan.
From the horror of realizing the unseen blitz to the shock of the broken tackle to the disbelieving admiration of the throw-on-the-move, this one play ran the emotional gamut of fandom.
The 49ers were up by 10 and the wind was gone from Seattle's sails.
After one of the worst possible first halves played by a QB (5 for 12, 38 yards), Smith became the glue that held that backbreaking drive together.
And two plays later, with a wacky deep ball into double coverage to Burleson that was picked off by the ankle-hobbled CB Shawntae Spencer, the Niners had the ball back and a chance to finish what Seattle couldn't.
The glare of Holmgren from the sideline was one of withering frustration, impotence, self-recrimination. Like a senior citizen arriving to a bank five minutes after it had closed for the day.
Gore ripped off gains of 18 and 40 yards, before at the Seattle 18-yard line on a third-and-eight, offensive coordinator Norv called for the unthinkable: a fake handoff to the naked bootleg QB run.
Smith faked, then scooted down the sideline for the unlikeliest of finishing blows to the unlikeliest of games. No Seahawk even saw Smith go past until it was far too late. Only Tapatu bothered to pursue.
Up in his booth, safe from the rain, Norv smiled a crinkly smile.
And the Niners' far-fetched playoff hopes for 2006 live on for another week.
