Welcome Back, You Didn't Miss Anything

Back after a week in northern Italy, hamming it up in Parma and so on. We turn our back for a couple of days and all hell breaks loose.

And we're not even talking about the Xmas tree fiasco at SeaTac (pause, wait for it, waiiit, nevermind). Nope, the first big story that crosses our screen is "Soy Makes You Gay." Apparently because soy is a feminizing devil food.

And here we were so hoping the story would be "Transfat makes you fat." Another day, that.

Baffling, this whole nutso need to blame what you eat on who you are. Thought it was the other way around, no?
Then along comes this morning's Wall Street Journal with a report that companies like Seattle's Trident Seafoods have succeeded in changing the name of "imitation crab" (that tasteless fish paste usually made from pollock or Pacific whiting). Food & Drug Admin will now let them call it, so help us, "Crab-flavored seafood, made with surimi, a fully cooked fish protein." This is better? Lobstermen and "real" crabbers are concerned that the ersatz krab might be mistaken for the real thing. But that's just silly: Costco's selling the real, real thing, Russian crablegs, for peanuts.

Basta! We're not going out into that windstorm for a soymilk latte after all.