The Future of Cinema... Is the Past

Now, people of our vintage were far too young--at the time that the drive-in's heyday began to wane--to have the requisite hormones necessary to warrant a night out at one. Our only cultural awareness of them was that one Brady Bunch episode in which Bobby saved Greg's life and subsequently took advantage of Greg's gratitude to invite himself on a date to the drive-in. (Poor Greg and Rachel!) We had, though, been on the grounds of several because many of Chicago's finest flea markets were held at drive-ins on Sundays. Although our uncle initially scared us into believing that we would have to kiss an old woman's bare bee-hind for admission, we quickly became fascinated with the mysterious, huge screen and the sturdy, metal speakers on posts.

And then we promptly forgot about them for many many years.

So, having finally reached puberty, we plotted several road trips this summer and aimed to visit all eight. Fortunately, six of them are found around Puget Sound, from Everett to Port Townsend. Puget Park Drive-In, just up north is the closest. Although a bit sterile--the entire area is asphalt--it is well-kept. Some blurb on its web site said something about days being numbered. We don't know whether that is in reference to the flea market or the entire operation; however, we would like to see this one stay open because it is so close and so conveniently located. Also, they seemed to be turning over good business the evening we were there.

Projector at Puget Park

If you live on the Sou'side, you might try the Valley Six in Auburn. Like Puget Park, it, too, is entirely hard-surfaced but it makes up for it with its six screens. Six! Moreover, if you get sick of self-conscious Seattle scenesters like we do at times, a trip to the real world of the South Sound works wonders.

Heading further and crossing onto the Kitsap, there is the three-screen Rodeo Drive-In outside of Port Orchard. We recommend hopping the Bremerton ferry and then heading out of town on route 3. That way, you can first enjoy the ferry, then a double feature, and finally the Narrows Bridge on the way back--a very proper Western Washingtopolitan motoring jaunt.

For more genteel character, though, you need head further out. Oak Harbor's Blue Fox Drive-In allows you to take-in military culture in addition to the double-feature. They play vintage cartoons before the show, as well as a nostalgic rendition of the national anthem, to which people respond by honking their horns and flashing their lights. It also features a go-kart track and a wonderfully-remodeled retro snack bar. The people here are pros; fully half of the cars are hatchbacks or pickups with mattresses thrown in back for, um, viewing comfort.

If sharing a film with pimply military brats ain't your thing, the Wheel-In across the Water in Port Townsend sports a western them. It is wonderfully surrounded by tall trees and has a novel room, just off the snack bar, with theater seats in case you don't want to sit in your car. But if that's the case, you might as well just spread a blanket out on the lawn in front of your car. The speakers here have been restored to working condition.

Also vying for best atmosphere is the Skyline Drive-In in Shelton. Grab a picnic basket, pack your Olympian friends, and head out to this gem nestled in the woods just off Highway 101. Like Olympia, the Skyline features a fascinating mix of more-conservative peninsular dwellers and capital city greeners, all enjoying cinema amidst the Kitsaptonian forest.

These six round out the Western Washington drive-ins. The remaining two are in Wenatchee and Colville. Sadly, we did not get a chance to vue them this summer. Provided the eastern side doesn't get frostbitten and fall off this winter, we shall have to check them out next season.

What we do know is that drive-ins are the awesomest things since film slicers. We think that the future of cinema is definitely its past. Regular theaters are so crowded, expensive, filthy, and uncouth. A drive-in, on the other hand, is always a double feature for $6 to $9. And you can bring in as much food and drink as you'd like --though you should occasionally buy a little somethin' somethin' so the proprietors earn some money. We always took a trip to the grocery beforehand to stock up on snap peas, sausage, crackers, hummus, drinks, and most importantly, cheese. Then, with the block of cheese firmly installed on the dash, we proceeded to commentate throughout and yell at the movie all we wanted... with impunity! And let us not forget: there is also necking.

(Greg Brady would be so proud.)

It is bit late this year to take in a drive-in movie as most of the theaters will be closing for the season in about two weeks if they are not already closed. However, when spring rolls around next year, hop into your loved one and take your automobile for a special treat. We'll try to remind you when the time comes cuz there is nothing like enjoying a movie, no matter how cheesy, under "nature's blanket". Additionally, there is nothing more patriotic: cars and crappy Hollywood flicks... God bless America!