Dirty Movies Abound

Even though today is Wednesday, as far as we're concerned, yesterday was Hump Day, since that's when submissions were due for The Stranger's first annual amateur porn contest. Public viewing of the, um, entries will be the evening of August 20th at the Northwest Film Forum, with the awards party later that night at Chop Suey.

In terms of dirty movies you can see in the very near future, The Aristocrats begins its run at the Neptune Friday. This film features what has long been thought of as the World's Dirtiest Joke™, as told by many notable comics, including Sarah Silverman, George Carlin, Drew Carey, Gilbert Gottfried, and an especially foul-mouthed Bob Saget. As filmmakers Penn Jillette and Paul Provenza promise:

The Aristocrats has no nudity, no sex, and no violence, but it's one of the most shocking movies you will ever see.

Then there's all the films currently showing that contain at least a little T and/or A:
· Wedding Crashers
· Dukes of Hazzard (albeit in a quasi-cocktease way)
· Broken Flowers
· The Beat That My Heart Skipped
· Last Days
· March of the Penguins (chockful of filthy penguin-on-penguin action)

Hopefully, no nudity will be found in Deuce Bigalow 2, opening---for the love of God, why?---this weekend, though we wouldn't mind some in Four Brothers. Not that we're particularly into Mark Wahlberg or Tyrese, but let's just say we wouldn't kick 'em outta the bed....

You'll have to wait all the way till the 19th to see actors really doin' it in Michael Winterbottom's latest, the actual-sex-but-not-porn 9 Songs. The film consists of a man's memories of a relationship now over, primarily comprised of a lotta music (see: title) and a lotta boning. Should serve as a good compliment to the Hump! screening that weekend.

Please note: No horses were violated in the making of this article.