Seattlest "Road Trip": Napa Valley
Don't get us wrong, we love this town. But sometimes it's just good to get away. Say, on a road trip. Say, where the drinky-drinky never stops flowing. And, say, where they would never deign to use the phrase "drinky-drinky" in casual conversation. And as luck would have it, through a series of--some would say--unfortunate events, Seattlest found itself in the odd circumstance of having viewed the Academy-snubbed gem of a flick Sideways no less than four times in one week. Which led us to the very firm conclusion that a little sommelier training was in order, and while the Woodinville scene provides grade-A anchors Columbia and Chateau Ste. Michelle, we decided a trip to the original Wine Country was in order. To ensure we could live out each and every wine-guzzling cinematic fantasy we had--except for the whole cheating on your fiancé thing. And the whole lying about being a novelist thing. Seattlest doesn't have to travel anywhere to do that. California, here we come!
Some believe road trips are highly overrated; that there is nothing romantic or adventurous or even remotely freeing about being stuck in a worn vinyl bucket seat for ten hours a day with the A/C blowing dust into all available facial orifices. Seattlest is not of this mind, but we still decided to forego the multi-day sojourn and hitch a ride with a more centrally located amiga who happened to fall under Sfist's jurisdiction. But seeing as how alcohol doesn't enter the picture until just outside Sonoma, that's where we start our tour de vin.
The first lesson learned? Sideways doesn't take place in Napa. It takes place in Santa Barbara. No matter. Second lesson learned? Giamatti was right. Steer clear of the Merlot. It's for plebes anyway. And Chablis? Despite being a dirty word in most affected circles, Seattlest found that it did not offend our palate (though, admittedly, neither do vinegar-soaked peas, so our palate is not exactly sensitive to the most delicate gustatory adjustments). But our favorite by far? Let's just say we've got a bad case of Muscat love. Now, Seattlest has had the pleasure of tasting the only-available at Chateau Ste. Michelle Muscat Canelli, after which we already pledged to name our first born. (Sorry, kid, but you'll understand when you're older…like, say, 21.) But having sipped the dessert Muscat down at V. Sattui's gratis tasting? Not to oversell the bottle too much, but oh, sweet nectar of the gods at last I've found thee. It can only be described as a subtly fruity, low viscose corn syrup. Dee-licious. And while it, too, is only available at the winery, they will ship to anywhere in the U.S. And at just $17 bucks a pop, it's well worth the cavities that will surely follow.
Peju was the most welcoming, telling us the "most important information first," namely the location of the bathrooms and where to find the best view. A quattro dinero fee for seven glasses of wine? We're so there. They seem to specialize in the reds and, apparently, in telling the more deep-pocketed patrons how "awesome" they are. Which, really, is worth the four bucks anyway.
Good rule of thumb for the kiddies out there? Nothing prevents a hangover like some triple cream brie and a baguette. Of course, nothing promotes a hangover like a trip to Napa Valley. Sure, we partook of several other wine tastings, but after the tenth complimentary glass, the vintages have a way of all running together. Seattlest remembers something about porcelain artichoke hearts sprouting up from the ground and being brutally rebuffed at the Coppolla estate due to some chi-chi hush-hush soiree, but we can't remember if this was some Alice in Wonderland-type hallucination or cold, hard fact.
One thing to remember whether traveling several hundred miles or simply exiting just off the 405: the wine world is chock full of rules. Good wine isn't always expensive and expensive wine isn't always good. But causing a scene at a pretentious establishment? That's priceless.
Bonus: Don't know your grafting from your maceration? Check out this handy Napa glossary.
